1 Peter 2:17 (b) — Family Love

Picture: A dozen or more goslings are all the same but all different.

… love the family of believers …

Peter’s theme is submission. He wants us to “submit … for the Lord’s sake.” We are to put ourselves under others in importance. By doing this we lift others up. They become more important in our eyes. 

This feels counter-intuitive to our egos. The part of us that stands apart from God does not want to submit. We glory in our independence and our power. We enjoy taking control of our lives and living large. At least as long as things go well. 

It is when we get a glimpse of our mortality that we sober up. Sometimes it is a close call. Other times it is something we see on the TV. Lately, our whole nation has been getting a splash of cold water in the face. What does it look like if our entire system of government collapses? Perhaps our nation will turn to God en masse. That is my prayer! 

When emotions run hot and close to the surface, conflict is easy. Yet Peter teaches submission. In a sense, he says we should put ourselves under the conflict. This doesn’t mean that we give up our values or pervert our faith. To the contrary, what Peter advocates is living our faith to the full. Especially when it comes to the family of believers. 

Like all families, the family of believers includes people. Each of us is unique, made in God’s image but also unique. Our God is infinitely creative, and so we are infinitely different. The beauty of Christianity is that God chose to offer salvation to people like me. In the Parable of the Wedding Feast, Jesus explains God’s plan: 

So the servants went out into the streets and gathered all the people they could find, the bad as well as the good, and the wedding hall was filled with guests.” (Matthew 22:10)

And so the family of God includes all kinds of people, “the bad as well as the good.” And all these people have personalities, and perspectives. They have ideas and beliefs. Some are book smart and some are street smart. What are the odds that any two of these people will agree on everything? What chance is there that all of them will agree on anything? Even when it comes to faith in God, don’t we all have different ideas of what that means? 

In many ways, the family of believers is very much like all our human families. In fact, all humanity. The difference is that we who believe submit to God. Peter tells us that God wants us to submit to each other as well. More than that, when it comes to the family of believers we are to love each other. 

How do we do that if we disagree? How do we love those who are different from us? How do we love the bad or even the good? And what about the confused or the misguided? 

The answer, for me, is to remember who I am. When I look in the mirror, or worse, when I open the door to the closet of my mind, I am confronted with who I am. When I am honest with myself, I have to marvel that Jesus could love me. Yet he does. Because he loves me, so I must love others. 

Application: Meditate on what it means to love the family of believers. 

Food for Thought: How do we love people who believe in Jesus but seem to disagree with everything else we believe in? 

7 Replies to “1 Peter 2:17 (b) — Family Love”

  1. I think it is important to define love to answer this question. One way to define love is seeking God’s intended good or intended best for someone else (there are other definitions, I just like this one).

    This is a choice in every interaction with others. Am I loving someone well? Am I choosing to seek and then do God’s intended good for that person through my attitude and actions?

    It is possible because it is a choice. The example is Jesus. He prayed for those who crucified Him – “Father, forgive them for they don’t know what they do.” He willingly died for terrible people (me).

    If He can choose to do that, with the power of the Holy Spirit I can choose to love a fellow believer who disagrees with me on some secondary issue. And I was commanded to do so (Matthew 22: 37 – 40; John 13: 34 – 35; John 15: 12 – 13; 1 John 4: 7 – 16).

  2. Rich,

    Thank you for the comment and the wonderful list of verses. (I have provided a link to the verses for anyone who wants to look them up.) Love can be complicated. Especially when we have to wrestle with our own feelings and overcome resentments.

  3. How do we love people who believe in Jesus but seem to disagree with everything else we believe in? 

    Totally agree with Rich regarding a believer, slow in bearing fruit.

    I am not writing about ministering to the unsaved or someone growing in the Lord here, I am writing about people claiming to be a christian but have no fruit, they are in fact weeds.
    My first priority must be focusing on obeying God as He uses His power to change me into the person He wants me to be. His love for me brought me to Him and His power is changing me from a self-centered person into a Christ centered person. The results have been visible, there has been change in my thoughts and actions as I have lived in the process of turning from sin.
    Romans 2:4, Don’t you see how wonderfully kind, tolerant, and patient God is with you? Does this mean nothing to you? Can’t you see that his kindness is intended to turn you from your sin?

    There are those who will say they are Christians, but have no fruit. Some have told me the Bible is out of date, parts or all do not apply today. Others have told me the Bible is true “ as originally written “, but do not believe God has the power to preserve what He commanded be written. God knows the hearts of all mankind and these will answer to Him.
    John 15:2, Every branch in Me that beareth not fruit, He taketh away.”

    We cannot closely associate with them or have a relationship with them because we have no common ground. I have tried to associate with them as an example, however they have tried to change me to their beliefs.
    Romans 16:17, Now I urge you, brethren, keep your eye on those who cause dissensions and hindrances contrary to the teaching which you learned, and turn away from them.

    Turn away from them, Avoid them.

    1. Ron,

      You raise an interesting and challenging point. It is a sad reality that there are weeds among the wheat and wolves among the flock. (Our study on Jude’s letter was an eye-opening insight into that truth.)

      I also find it sad that there are so many other things believers find to argue about. We can disagree on almost anything from the music in church to the color of the carpets. My hope is that in all of these situations we are guided by love for God above all else and love for our neighbor as ourselves.

  4. That’s a good question,..it’s not a easy one to answer,..

    The elders of the church we attended decided to vote my wife out for not attending as much as they thought that she should,..the Pastor told me the day before the business meeting,..I resigned that day,..so the church didn’t have a problem voting my wife out,..my resignation wasn’t mentioned until the next business meeting and from what I was told not a hand was raised to vote me out,..it was if they wanted me to act as if nothing happened because my wife wasn’t attending anyway,..a bunch of Jesus believers that had no problem voting a family member out instead of seeking out why she wasn’t attending,..Wouldn’t Jesus have left the 99 to go after that one?

    Anyway needless to say after 15 yrs we are no longer members of that church,..how can I love believers like that,..by leaving in love,..I gave the Pastor a hug as I turned the keys in to the building,..things could have gone differently,…anyway it’s like a wound that will take a while to heal,..but I know God has a purpose and a church for us,..

    I am still in disagreement with what they believe in on voting people out,..I feel we are better off loving them from a distance,..no pun intended,..

    Well there was my rant,..keep smiling in Christ!

    1. John,

      I pray that God will heal that wound from 15 years ago. It sounds like it was a deep and painful wound. I know many of us share a similar experience. Church wounds can be some of the worst kind.

      Perhaps there is something we can learn from this kind of pain? I think it helps me appreciate Jesus’ love for his people more. He (God) was rejected by his own people. Yet he suffered and died for them, and for us.

      Anyway, thanks for sharing, John. I think your words will probably be an encouragement to others who have been hurt too. I’m glad you shared your “rant” with us.

  5. Thank you Ron and John for your stories and input. John, what this church did was inexcusable. I think it is fair to say that they did not love you or your wife well. Unfortunately, it is an example of what we should not do. I am sorry you had to live it and still deal with it.

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