Take me away with you—let us hurry!
Summary: Valentine’s Day is all about love, but what kind?
The word “love,” as we have discussed many times on this blog, has many meanings. The meanings of Greek words we translate as “love” range from the love of self (Philautia) to godly love (Agapé). Somewhere in the middle are Eros (romantic love), Pragma (enduring love), and Storge (familial love).
Over the years, Valentine’s Day has become associated with romantic love. Romance is nice, but there is so much more to keeping a relationship alive. Pondering this got me thinking about what the Bible says.
It is not like the Bible ignores romantic love. Solomon’s “Song of Song” is a mildly erotic love letter between Solomon and his future wife Number 835. (I am guessing at the number, but she probably wasn’t his first wife or his last one, either.) It begins with this passage:
Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth—
for your love is more delightful than wine.
Very quickly, the passions of the moment well up. Just two verses later, she urges, “Take me away with you — let us hurry!”
Being a man of many wives, Solomon understood that romance alone was not enough to keep a marriage going. In fact, it is a bit of a two-way street. Although not attributed to Solomon, Proverbs includes a passage titled, “The Wife of Noble Character” in the very last chapter. It begins this way:
A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.
Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value. (Proverbs 31: 10-11)
In a way, it sounds like Proverbs is suggesting men should “marry rich.” While the mind of the worldly immediately turns to money, the potential husband of “noble character” understands what true riches are. Of course, the opposite is true, too. Women looking for romance are wise to look for men of a godly character.
Besides being honored by those who are courting, Valentine’s Day is also a favorite for those of us who are already married. It is a day that reminds us of new romance, but also a day that celebrates the enduring love (Pragma) of marriage.
The best Valentine’s Gift of all is Agapé, the selfless, giving love that God shows us every day. And the best tonic for any relationship, no matter how old or stale, is a strong dose of God’s love. The power of God to transform us into his image and renew marriage relationships is unparalleled.
Whatever your situation is, looking forward to romance, finding it, or keeping the fires burning, I hope you will include God in your heart. His love makes all other love possible.
Application: Marry rich. If you are already married, enrich your marriage with God’s love.
Food for Thought: How does God’s presence in our heart affect our relationship with others?
How does God’s presence in our heart affect our relationship with others?
As our relationship with God strengthens, and we become more like God, we begin to bear the fruits of the Spirit, which are also attributes that enable us to form closer relationships with the people around us.
Galatians 5:22-23 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.”
Also, as we bear the fruits to others, our relationship with God grows stronger. Being kind and understanding, and telling those around us about the Truth please and honor God.
Matthew 25:40 “The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’”
God’s presence in our hearts affects our relationship with others because it changes our focus from ourselves to others and how we interact with them.
Thank you, Chris.
Having God soften our hearts while we live in a harsh world is a miraculous experience!
Well put, Chris.
In general, God calls us to love by sacrifice and service.
Isn’t the same true in marriage? If both spouses serve each other and are willing to give things up for the other’s benefit, will they not do well?
Of course, God does not call us to be obsessed with our spouse, so this serving is not doing everything they ask like a servant, but having a heart attitude that is about giving instead of taking. And when both give, then they are both filled to give more. And built up to do God’s will for their lives.
God’s presence in a relationship gives it a high standard that goes against the culture around us. The man shall be the head, but even that phrase seen by the culture means something very different than God’s interpretation. God says the head shall give up his life for the body, not demand to be obeyed. He shall love and protect her.
The woman is to submit. Oh yes culture, please tone down the feminism with a little humility, and calm down your offense with reality. Submission is not oppression, again, submission is not oppression. It is not being a rug under his feet, it is not diminishing into the background. Submission is primarily about respect. Respect his ideas, respect his position (remember he’s the head), respect his responsibilities, respect his needs. Your voice should still be heard and he is so much more willing to listen to a woman who respects and honors him, than an obstinate nag.
But also God’s presence will include discipline. Not like one would a child, but training each other up to be more Christ like. That means loving correction will be involved (going both ways) and that always requires grace, no matter who it is.
😂 Looking back at the question and it wasn’t really marriage specific, but oh well. Marriage is one specific relationship that usually lasts longer in your life than all others. It will bring out more difficulties than any other relationship, and more intimacy than any other relationship.
Really the idea of serving and sacrificing, loving correction, submission and authority, these are pretty core. Easy to talk about and hard to practice.
Thank you A
A –
Nice essay! You are right, the question intentionally avoided marriage because we need love in every relationship.
Haha! Blessings, yeah that did get long. Can you tell what topic has come up a lot in my life?
02-14-2022, Song of Songs 1:4a How does God’s presence in our heart affect our relationship with others?
We are physical beings, limited to the affections we can generate within the priorities established by our flesh. These priorities have been shaped by our genetic make up and the environment we have been raised in. Without God our first priority is “our survival “ and “love for self,” leaving some level of feeling toward others depending upon what they will do for our feeling of self worth. It is a cold, lonely existence.
Agape love comes from God, not our own effort and is sacrificial love that voluntarily suffers inconvenience, discomfort, and even death for the benefit of another without expecting anything in return. Only God in our hearts is the power to make us capable of giving Agape love to others.
John 17:26, Romans 5:5, Galatians 5:22
As believers, we know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love. God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is
love.
1 John 4:16, 1 John 4:8
The presence of God in our hearts is the Power to overcome the power of self who becomes our last priority. The welfare of others becomes our primary concern as we begin to die to self and live for God. We find pleasure in allowing God to serve others through us and our lives become lives in submission to God rather than our selfish flesh. Seeing others prosper and grow is a wonderful heart warming experience beyond description, and becomes our growing first priority.
Ron,
As I read your thoughts in the comments, I often get a picture in my mind of what your words say to me. Today the picture is of each believer (myself included) being absorbed into our God as we become one with him. As we do that, we are less and less concerned about our self, and more and more concerned with the wellbeing of others. I don’t know if that makes any sense, but in my mind it is a very cool picture! 🙂
Jeff,
You placed a perfect picture in my mind, of our lives in Christ.
I enjoy your point of “being absorbed into our God.” Eternal peace in our Holy God.
God Bless You Brother!
Ron
Thank you Ron for your comment. I enjoyed everyone’s answers. But the next question after serving others and caring more for them than yourself. At what point have you given enough? Or given all you can of yourself to one person and already have a few more that need help? How do you decide that it’s best to stop serving here or there? So many more questions come to mind, not ones of the need to be a servant but at what point do you say no, I’m sorry but I need to help others too?
I guess I needed to read it again.
Agape love comes from God, not our own effort and is sacrificial love that voluntarily suffers inconvenience, discomfort, and even death for the benefit of another without expecting anything in return.
You Got it Mr. T, There are no limits to God or any of His Attributes.
Well covered in the comments and well done I don’t have much to add. The real “St Valentine” was killed for defying the emperor’s orders and married young couples so the men would not have to go to war. Or at least that is the story. So in a way, he gave his life so others could live. That is a love that reflects the love of Christ. His motives could be debated. Christ’s motives are clear and He is the greatest lover of all.
Amen!
Jeff, Beautifully written and great reminders on how to love my sweetheart on this special romantic day! Thanks, Jeff!
Thank you, Jim! Welcome to the blog!!