A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown,
but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.
Summary: Solomon switches gears suddenly and turns his focus on the married. How does our faith in God impact our relationship with our spouse? If we do a little reading between the lines we see that there is a right way and a wrong way to be a spouse.
The Book of Proverbs is a bit like a windup toy that spins and jerks this way and that and then races off to crash into a random wall. One never quite knows which direction Solomon’s words are going to go.
Yesterday, we were looking at the broad concepts of righteousness and wickedness. Today, we are focused on marriage.
The first time we read the phrase “noble character” in the Bible is in the story of Ruth. Ruth, a woman from Moab, has been gleaning in the fields of Boaz. Her mother-in-law, Naomi, has instructed her on how to let Boaz know she would like to be his wife. Boaz is pleased that she appreciates him.
The story is recorded in Ruth 3. It is heartwarming because of all the trouble that had fallen on Ruth and Naomi. Ruth proved herself faithful to her mother-in-law and faithful to God. Boaz recognized this and describes Ruth this way: “All the people of my town know that you are a woman of noble character.” (Ruth 3: 11) In Ruth, we see a living definition of what it means to be of “noble character.”
For an example of the opposite, we don’t have to look very far. Israel herself is unfaithful to God. She disgraces him by running after foreign idols and sacrificing her own children to lifeless images of wood, metal, and stone (Isaiah 57:5).
I think it is important to note that today’s passage is like a two-edged sword. It cuts both ways. Solomon assumes the husband is also of a noble character. After all, his entire collection of proverbs is aimed at developing noble character in his sons. That is why a “disgraceful wife” is like “decay in his bones.” But what if the husband is disgraceful?
Imagine a husband who has no moral standing. He acts disgracefully in the things he does. Now imagine that his wife is a woman of “noble character.” Will this be any different? Won’t the wife’s integrity gall the disgraceful husband?
Best of all is a man of noble character who loves and trusts God and is married to a woman of noble character. When both partners in a marriage submit to God, they are both each other’s “crown.”
Application: If you are married, look in the mirror before complaining about your spouse.
Food for Thought: How would you define “noble character”?
According to Strong’s, the Hebrew word has a wide range of meanings, including efficient wealthy and strong. It is translated as capable, able and valiant in other places. I think the word character may be a better indicator of what is being said. She has good character and integrity as opposed to someone with questionable character that causes inward decay. We often use character and integrity when referring to men, but as we see here it is an important quality in all of God’s people.
Amen Rich.
Is that why people often refer to me as a “character”?
🙂
You and me both brother
🙂
07-03-2022, Proverbs 12:4, How would you define “noble character”?
A person whose source of power is Jesus Christ, through the power of the Holy Spirit, who walks in fear of the Lord and increasingly displays the fruit of the Spirit in their life.
Yes, Ron.
Jesus is the source of all our “good” character traits.
Character is the fruit of conscience.
Noble is just one diamond in the crown of character.
Nicely said!!
⭐ ⭐ ⭐
Since women in the Bible were not often the focus we don’t see nearly as many examples of this as one might expect to see over such a large coarse of time.
Several that come to mind, apart from what you already mentioned, include King David. How Michal, Saul’s daughter disgraced David. Or how she perceived that David disgraced her and was cursed by God for it. How Nabal disgraced Abigail and Abigail saved him from David, so that after his passing David married her.
Another example is Hosea and Gomer. Which parallels your example of Israel.
So noble character….. Is this not again a problem of values and perspective?
Michal believed she was noble. Daughter of a king, married to a king. She had a certain image of herself and this man of war she married decides to dance in the streets, regardless of who sees and regardless of how it could affect his image…… Does her view sound that bad?
David, though is not just a man of a war, he is a man of God, both attributes worthy of respect. He’s also a shepherd…. Less worthy appearing but God tells us that it is a worthy attribute. Though he is all three of these things, when God’s ark of the covenant is returned the man of God attribute is most prominently displayed as he dances with pure joy and celebration. Afterwards he hears his wife call him a fool for having praised his God, who has given him every victory in battle and a nation, who has the noble character?
Nabal has a farm and refuses to thank, acknowledge, feed, speak kindly to the warriors who have protected his animals and land.
Abigail sees these warriors, she apologizes to them, makes herself low, and feeds them.
Hosea is noble, doing as God asks, repeatedly bringing his wayward wife back home. Gomer, I don’t think she thought of herself as noble, but she definitely thought Hosea was a fool.
Now I think of the novels that emphasize the class differences by titling people as noblemen…. But that’s about money or lineage and not by character. If someone has that in their head when thinking ‘noble’ they’ll think putting oneself higher than others is noble character.
Okay, I went far and wide with this. But my point is, just like what we see with righteousness and goodness, there are many ways a noble character is defined. God’s version will leave you with a crown, and the other versions will leave you rotting.
A –
Thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts here. Just to echo what you are saying, the definition of noble is rooted in whether or not we base our definition on God. From God’s perspective, everything looks decidedly different than from man’s perspective.