The righteous choose their friends carefully,
but the way of the wicked leads them astray.
Summary: So many things in life influence the direction our steps take. Solomon shines light on one of the most important.
I almost laugh when I read this proverb. I used to feel like the old joke about the kid who was so homely that his mom had to tie a steak around his neck to get the dog to play with him.
I exaggerate, of course, but there is a bit of truth in that. When I was a kid, our family moved a lot. One year here, two years there, four years in a third spot. It was hard on the whole family. We all suffered from the same challenge: How do you make friends that last if you are leaving them behind after a short time?
When a person is deprived of friends, it is a bit like being deprived of food. Just like hungry people can overeat, people hungry for friendship can become over-anxious about making new friends. When this happens, we might not choose our friends as carefully as we ought.
When I was in grade school, we moved to a new town (again!). It was very different from the places we had lived before. It was a small, rural community where everyone knew everyone else, except for the “new people.” One kid that I ended up spending time with was about as different from me as you could imagine.
Sadly, his family background was what Solomon might call “wicked.” He seemed to have no moral instinct except for that which served himself. Years later, long after school, I heard that he had ended up in prison and eventually died there. The “ways of the wicked” certainly led him astray. If I had accepted him as a friend instead of a curious acquaintance, my life might have been led astray, too.
After a long time, I married and settled down in one place. I have lived in the same town for almost four decades. Things are different when you get to know people over that length of time. You can watch people as they live their lives and it is easier to choose friends carefully.
I am blessed to know many people I count as friends who avoid the ways of the wicked. They seldom fit the same mold, and I am not sure how many would agree on their favorite political candidates, but with friends, that doesn’t matter. The right kind of friends, anyway.
Application: Take an inventory of the people you think of as friends. How do their life choices compare to Solomon’s description of righteousness?
Food for Thought: What characteristics do you look for in a friend?
There are many important characteristics in someone being a friend: similar interests, integrity, character. The number one characteristic for me is that they love Jesus and His word. But even as I write this I know I am also needing to befriend unbelievers to be a gospel witness. But any friend whom I listen to and seek counsel will be one who knows the Lord and seems truth in His word.
Ah! Nice distinction, Rich.
There are “friends” who are more of an acquaintance, and then there are “friends” who we can rely on, who are more like a brother.
Proverbs 17:17, Proverbs 18:24
07-28-2022, What characteristics do you look for in a friend?
After Jesus, my very best friend is my wife. We trust each other with everything, support each other, compromise when it is important to the other, trust in the counsel of the other, make sacrifices for each other, celebrate and cry with one another. When she calls, I drop everything and she does the same for me as we each give the other priority over ourselves. And the list goes on.
We have been made one by God and are growing in this new person God has created.
Thank you Ron as a friend I value your wisdom knowledge and understanding of the Bible and your advice/comments you make. I try to apply those words that my friends give me in my life and relationship with the beautiful Angela. So one characteristic requirement of a person that is more than a acquaintance ( worldly friend ) is that they are also a friend of Jesus. Those are my brothers and sisters in Christ.
Good to hear from you Mr. T. You Got it, there are some people in the world, whose company I enjoy, and I do my best to allow them to see Christ in me. However My friends are are all Followers of Christ.
1 Corinthians 15:33, Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.”
Proverbs 13:20, Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.
Ron,
What a nice description of friendship! You inspire me!