[Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt,] …so that you may know how to answer everyone.
Summary: Knowing how to answer everyone is both a gift and a skill. Paul’s final word of advice in his letter is that we should “know how to answer everyone.”
Perhaps you have seen one of those drawings that can be seen in different ways. For example, this first one is called a “Rubin Figure,” named after a Danish psychologist, Edgar Rubin.
The question Edgar wrestled with is whether we see a “face” or a “vase.”
The principle Edgar discovered is called a “bistable figure.” That is because it can be seen in two different ways.
Another famous example was designed by Louis Necker, a Swiss scientist. This one is called the “Necker Cube:”
If you stare at it long enough, it will shift from one orientation to another.
Paul’s passage today is similar. If we look at it one way, it means one thing, but if we stare at it long enough, it can mean something else.
Some people might take this passage to mean something similar to one of Peter’s instructions:
“But in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have.” (1 Peter 3:15)
Others might take it to mean something similar to a proverb:
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” (Proverbs 15:1)
The question is, does knowing how to answer someone mean knowing what to say or how to say it?
Both are important, and both have their place.
Perhaps the right answer is to not forget either. After all, Jesus didn’t give us a list of rules to memorize or a seven-step plan of salvation. He gave us a simple command, “Love one another” (John 13:24).
He also said, “Do to others as you would have them do to you” (Luke 6:31).
Do you like people telling you what to do, or do you prefer that people come alongside and get to know you?
Someone once said that God gave us two ears and one mouth because we are to listen twice as much as we talk. Paul says our conversation should be “full of grace” and “seasoned with salt.”
Someone full of God’s grace and seasoned with the richness of his Word and Spirit will certainly know how to answer everyone.
Application: Speak softly and carry your Bible.
Food for Thought: How does God’s Spirit help us to know how to answer people?
Illustrations provided by author.
There are many potential answers. To give room for others I will mention just one.
One way the Holy Spirit helps us answer others is by bringing Scripture to mind at the right times. Jesus said the Spirit would remind His disciples of Jesus’ words. I think the Holy Spirit can prompt us to remember Scripture when needed. But then we do have to do the work of knowing Scripture.
John 14: 25 – 26 (Jesus speaking to His disciples): “All this I have spoken while still with you. But the Advocate, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you.
Thank you, Rich!
You speak of what you know! 🙂
Well I thought about this question a lot, and I have to admit that oftentimes there is a lot of noise going on in my head. And when in a conversation that noise is a cocktail of my own thoughts, emotions, and a compulsion to give the “right” answer. So I think a good answer is to ask the Holy Spirit simply and in humility “what would you have me say here?” That always calms the storm, and I start listening to hear His voice, and in doing so, I am listening to everything, instead of talking in my head. And as Rich said, then Scripture comes to mind, and also insight into the actual conversation comes to light. The Holy Spirit helps us to know how to answer people by helping us discern what is really being said, the “need of the person” within the conversation. Sometimes there are multiple needs that the Holy Spirit wants to touch on before the conversation ends. I believe that the Holy Spirit wants to open up people’s hearts, and when we approach Him with an open heart, we can deliver His message of hope.
Nicely said, Chris!
I especially like the focus on people’s needs. Such an important point!
How does God’s Spirit help us to know how to answer people?
John 16:7 that it was to our benefit that he would go away so we would receive the Holy Spirit.
Romans 1`2:2, Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
James 1:19 Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.
An old saying, “ We learn more listening than speaking.”
As a shift supervisor at my desk, a lady came to me, holding a rag around one of her hand, told me she needed a maintenance man, because she had broken her machine, I noticed red on the rag and asked what had happened. She had been operating a machine and punched a hole in Her finger. We immediately got to the first aid office, laid her down and called for medical help and we got her fixed up. Saved the finger.
We have been saved, taught, grown in Christ, and today serve God, because at some point we stopped listening to ourselves and chose to listen to and apply God truths for our lives.
Often people will be asking a question and will need our help getting to the real or root problem they have. We as the listener must learn to give their issue priority over all things as we focus our full attention, eyes & ears with a discerning ( not judgmental ) spirit on the person or topic of our exchange. We will receive understanding of their root issue, and truthfully respond.
Thank you, Ron!
Very interesting example!