A deacon must be faithful to his wife and must manage his children and his household well.
Summary: Once more, Paul circles back to his guiding principles for church leadership.
Does this passage sound familiar? Let’s compare it to what Paul wrote about overseers:
“Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife, … must manage his own family well…” (1 Timothy 3:2-4)
Almost identical!
Both the overseer and the deacon must be temperate and self-controlled, avoiding violence in their words and actions, and be spiritually minded, not pursuing material gain.
Because the two job descriptions are similar, it might be helpful to focus on the differences between them, instead of what is the same.
The overseer must not be a recent convert. That suggests to me that they are well established in the faith. Deacons, however, must be “tested” (v 10), suggesting a different means of determining their understanding of spiritual matters.
The other two requirements given for overseers, but not deacons, are being hospitable and being able to teach.
Paul’s point is well made. Both overseers and deacons are required to meet specific standards. Interestingly, Paul’s standards are practical applications of the “fruit of the Spirit” he lists in Galatians 5:22-23.
The real difference is that overseers carry additional public and leadership-oriented skills. These include teaching, hospitality, and a good reputation among outsiders (v 7). The deacon, on the other hand, is the faithful steward. If they teach, it is by example. Their hospitality is in their service.
Application: For those who are overseers and deacons, hold fast to these principles. For other believers, strive to achieve the same.
Food for Thought: When Paul mentions a leader must “manage his children well,” what kind of children is he talking about — young ones or older? Does it matter?
Thanks for this “mini series” on elders and deacons brother. I think you have handled this really well. Good stuff.
Thank you, Rich!
It is good to see you here again! 🙂
The more we dug into Paul’s words about deacons and overseers, the more I was amazed at how consistent he is in his instructions and with the rest of Scripture, and how practical his guidance is.
When Paul mentions a leader must “manage his children well,” what kind of children is he talking about — young ones or older? Does it matter?
I don’t believe it matters. I believe our children are in our household until they create their own household, and even then, they are still our children. I think managing children and the household goes beyond the day-to-day activities, or a certain period of our children’s lives. I believe it is a lifetime development process as the parent is always the one who has gone before and prepares the way for their child.
The Bible tells us children are a heritage and a reward:
Psalm 127:3 Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward.
It is our responsibility to raise them to fear and love the Lord:
Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
Deuteronomy 6:6–7 And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.
It is our responsibility to discipline them with love:
Proverbs 13:24 Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.
Proverbs 29:17 Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will give delight to your heart.
It is our responsibility to be a Godly example:
Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.
It is our responsibility to be a help, not a hindrance, in their life-skills development and in receiving, believing, accepting, and living faith in Jesus Christ, and a relationship with God:
Matthew 19:14 But Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.”
Thank you, Chris!
Great verses!
When Paul mentions a leader must “manage his children well,” what kind of children is he talking about — young ones or older? Does it matter?
1 Timothy 3:4-5, He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full respect. 5 (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?)
Verses 4-5, Timothy is writing about the leaders management of His own family, his own children, in a manner worthy of the full respect of others. Children who have been raised with loving discipline, and have matured in genuine concern for the well being of others.
Thanks Ron!
Yes, when children are raised in a loving environment it makes all the difference.